Life · Lists

8 Things That No One Tells You About Being Pregnant

1.Heartburn. To be honest I don’t think heartburn even covers the sensation that you experience during pregnancy. There were points during my pregnancy that I thought my lungs were on fire.

Towards the end of my pregnancy I ended up just carrying a bottle of Gaviscon around with me and swigging from the bottle. (I don’t recommend this as I’m sure it’s not medically safe).Β 

2. Questions. Questions. Questions. Just because you’re now sporting a pretty sizable bump people now think they have free reign to ask you whatever they want.

Do you know what you’re having?

Have you picked out names?

Are you still having sex?Β 

3. You will forget what it is like to breathe normally. Thanks to a couple of tiny feet kicking you in the ribs and taking up some valuable space that your lungs would normally use. Breathing becomes crazy hard and sometimes quite painful.

4. People aren’t always nice. You see those really nice baby on board badges you see heavily pregnant women wearing on the underground? Lots of people do not give a fuck. They will pretend to sleep, suddenly be super into their couple of the evening standard and sometimes you get the really brazen ones that decide that your not worthy of their seat. Charmers.

5. On the other hand lots of people will start treating you like a piece of fine china that needs to be wrapped up in cotton wool. Forget what it was like doing everything for yourself because these individuals won’t let you! (Yvo wouldn’t even let me walk the dog).

6. The closer you get to your due date the ability to function becomes basically impossible. You’re struggling to breathe, you’re not sleeping, you feel the size of a house and you’re sweating quite profusely. Sexy huh! Pregnancy glow? I don’t think so.

7. No one can prepare you for the reactions you will receive when you tell people your news. Lots of people said “How?” to me, I was never sure if this was an invitation to start explaining the birds and the bees to the men I work with.

8. Before your baby, maternity leave is boring. You’re just sat waiting for your baby to arrive, most of your other half and friends are at work. What the heck do you do!!

 

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