Since having a baby I have really struggled to find myself. I am the first one in my circle of friends to have a baby and with that it means that I don’t have a close knit circle of friends who understand what I’m going through. Some of my friends are still studying, some are very much career orientated and well some of them just don’t have a bloody clue and well hi I’m here with a baby and a dog, talk about domesticated!
Anyway this Sunday my friends decided to surprise me for my half birthday (I didn’t get the chance to celebrate my birthday in July – cos you know I was 8 and half months pregnant and just wanted to sleep). Anyway they surprised me and took me to Bourne and Hollingsworth in Angel for a bottomless brunch and you know what it was amazing, not just because after 8 Bellini’s I had a warm fuzzy feeling.
There’s no denying that since the arrival of Nora my confidence and self-esteem have hit lows that I haven’t seen since I was 15 and struggling with my first period and the arrival of my boobs! I don’t really feel like a whole person anymore and I just don’t feel good enough. Anyway it turns out going out for Bellini’s and seriously limited baby chat was just what I needed.
I left Nora with her Dad, it’s taken me a while to realise that saying I need a break isn’t a sign of weakness it’s the best thing for everyone. And it actually means that Yvo gets to spend some quality time with his daughter without me being fussy and telling him what to do. He doesn’t need that; I need to give the man more credit sometimes!
So we got on the tube, it was nice just jumping on the escalators rather than looking around for the ever so elusive lifts! We headed to Angel and to the lovely Bourne and Hollingsworth for a beautiful full English and as I’ve mentioned once or twice, bottomless Bellini’s! The food was delicious, I had sausages, mushrooms, poached eggs and a hash brown, come to Mumma! Each sitting is for two hours and we made full use of those two hours. We sat in the nice conservatory bit of the restaurant surrounded by plants and bathed in natural sunlight. We sat and we laughed, we spoke about our plans for the festive period and where we would be spending Christmas day (about 5 minutes from each other). It was also nice to hear what my other friends had been up to whilst I’d been busy ‘mothering’ as it were!
Anyway at the end of breakfast, we stopped off at the Hummingbird bakery for a bit of half birthday, birthday cake and a present for our other halves (aren’t we sweet). And we headed for home. I came back to my little family, a little bit buzzed (thank you prosecco) and feeling really content. I have the best of both worlds, friends to help me find myself again and re build my confidence and then I get to come home to my family.